by Dana Rubin‑Winkelman, MSW, CAPSW, Social Worker
There is a good reason why moms hold a special place in our hearts. Moms love unconditionally, help keep us healthy, teach us values and life lessons, lift us up when we need it most, and are forever our number one fan. Although Mother’s Day is not a Jewish holiday, the Torah reminds us to honor our mothers at all times. A mother’s commitment and devotion are often the very foundation of the family.
As we approach Mother’s Day, it is also a meaningful time to pause and remember our mothers—not only through celebration, but through reflection. Think about the beautiful lessons they taught us, the quiet sacrifices they made, and the memories that continue to shape who we are. Whether it’s a phrase they used to say, a tradition they created, or simply the feeling of being loved and cared for, these moments stay with us and guide us in ways both big and small. In remembering them, we keep their love and wisdom alive in our daily lives.
This Sunday, we honor and celebrate our mothers, stepmothers, foster mothers, grandmothers, and bubbes—and, ideally, carry that gratitude with us every day. May we all find a way to express it—today and always.
“Who needs superheroes when I have Mom?” (unknown)
CELEBRATING MOTHERS:
1. Did you Know That we have a Jewish Mother’s Day?: On the Jewish calendar, the 11th of the Hebrew month of Cheshvan commemorates the passing of our matriarch Rachel. This lesser-known date is sometimes thought of as a kind of Jewish Mother’s Day. Rabbi Judy Chessin shares a beautiful perspective on this and explains why Rachel is considered the “quintessential Jewish mother.”
2. Remembering Special Motherly Memories and Feelings: Mental imagery and visualization are powerful tools that can improve mood and support positive mental health. Since moms often bring us so much joy and comfort, let’s take a moment to pause and reflect on a cherished motherly memory. Take a deep breath and, if you’re comfortable, close your eyes. Picture a moment filled with motherly love. Even if that person is no longer here physically, imagine them surrounding you with warmth and light. Feel their presence, their care, and their love. These positive images can be incredibly healing.
3. Motherly Wisdom: Moms have a way of saying things—offering wisdom (sometimes when we want it… and sometimes when we don’t!) through memorable expressions. Rabbi Avis Miller calls them “Momilies,” and I love that. Below are a few classics, along with some of my own Mom Arlene’s favorites. What “Momilies” did you grow up hearing? I bet you have your own—think of them and smile.
- You get more flies with honey than with vinegar.
- Never go out of the house without lipstick. You never know whom you’ll meet.
- When you praise yourself, it stinks; when relatives praise you, it limps; when strangers praise you, it sounds great.
- You can’t put your head on their shoulders.
- If you can’t say something nice, don’t say it at all.
- Too much is unhealthy.
- It’s either feast or famine.
These are just a few of my Mom Arlene’s “Momilies.” I’ve learned from them, taken them to heart, and now catch myself repeating them to my own children. My mom has always been—and continues to be—a wonderful teacher, guiding force, listener, and friend. Thank you, Mom-I love you.
- “There is always light at the end of the tunnel.” I am so grateful for this Momilie. Even in the darkest moments, look toward the light and keep hope in your heart. This lesson has carried me through difficult times.
- “It’s never greener on the other side.” My mom gave this a Jewish twist by saying, “You don’t want what ‘Yenim’ has.” I have often wondered—who is Yenim anyway?! Is this even a name? Well, Yenim or no Yenim… the message is clear: appreciate what you have.
4. Mothers Teach by Showing: Sadly, my dear mother-in-law, Judy, passed away this year. I want to share a sweet story about her.
Many moons ago, when my husband Adam and I were dating, I met his parents for the first time. It was a big deal—they flew in from Arizona to meet us in Chicago. During their visit, they wanted to buy Adam a gift, so we went shopping on busy Michigan Avenue. While browsing in Crate and Barrel, I accidentally walked backwards into an enormous, four-foot, cone-shaped display of 50+ glasses. Yes, you guessed it—the entire display came crashing down! I stood there, frozen and horrified, turning about 50 shades of red.
And then, in that very moment, in the middle of the bustling store, my soon-to-be mother-in-law shouted, “MAZEL TOV!” She reassured me that as long as I wasn’t hurt, everything was okay—because only the glasses were broken, not me. I still laugh when I think about it. I will never forget her kindness, humor, and warmth—or the lesson she taught me that day. Through their actions, moms show us what truly matters.
“Life doesn’t come with a manual; it comes with a mother.” (unknown)
5. A Little Motherly Brain Boost: Here are a few fun exercises to try—on your own or with loved ones. Activities that involve recall, word-finding, and creative thinking help strengthen neural connections and keep the mind active and engaged. Even better, when done with others, they can spark connection, laughter, and shared memories.
- In honor of mothers everywhere, see how many mothers from history, literature, or Jewish tradition you can name—and what made each one so memorable.
- Make a “mother list marathon”—how many famous mothers can you come up with from books, movies, TV, or real life? Don’t be surprised if you think of more than you expected once you get started!
- For a fun challenge: how many Hollywood mother–daughter acting duos can you name? Extra credit if you can find anyone who shared the screen together.
6. Continue the Mother’s Day Spirit—Art, Connection & Community: Even after Mother’s Day has passed, the spirit of honoring the important women in our lives can continue. Consider a special outing with family or friends at Ovation Communities’ Spring Art Walk & Artist Reception on Sunday, May 17, from 1:00 pm –3:00 pm. The event is free and open to the public, with free underground parking at 1414 N. Prospect Ave. Don’t miss this joyful afternoon of art, inspiration, and connection—see the attached poster for more information.
7. Mother’s Day Music and Memories: Take a few moments to enjoy these songs that celebrate mothers and the lasting impact they have on our lives. Whether your mother is still with you or lives on in memory, music has a way of bringing her close again—along with the love, wisdom, and stories that stay with us. You may find yourself smiling, remembering, or even quietly singing along as you revisit these meaningful tunes.
- “Mama Said” by The Shirelles: This 1961 song is a classic with a reassuring message—drawing on a mother’s wisdom to get through life’s ups and downs. Click for the 2-minute audio.
- “My Yiddishe Mama,” popularized by Sophie Tucker: This is a heartfelt tribute to mothers with strong Jewish cultural roots. It’s sentimental, familiar, and brings both smiles and nostalgia. Click for the 2-minute video.
- “Mother and Child Reunion by Paul Simon: A gentle, uplifting message about reunion and connection. Click for the 3-minute audio.
8. Standing Together- Strength in Unity: Many in our community continue to feel concern for Israel and the rise in antisemitism worldwide. Without taking a political stance, we can still choose to respond with intention—by strengthening connection, speaking out against hate in our own ways, and supporting one another in our families, communities, and networks. As we reflect on the strength and care modeled by mothers across generations, we are reminded that standing together and choosing compassion are powerful acts of resilience, dignity, and hope.
“All of us are guided by the most powerful of all the angles– our mother.” (unknown)
If you have questions about aging, memory changes, community resources, or caregiving, I’m here to help. Please don’t hesitate to contact me — I’d be happy to assist.
Warmly,
Dana
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